Screwtype Letter

By: Amie Wohrer

Dearest nephew,

I am pleased with your labors, but there is one area where you are lacking; the repeaters. My boy, this is not new nor is it difficult. We have worked with many patients in the past who have made very good little cogs. Remember our friend with the funny tuft of hair on his lip? What a grand specimen! A swimming success! And now nephew, the patients have the ability to communicate on a scale we could never have imagined. They are consumed by it. It is all they do. No more blasted family evenings or Sunday mornings. No. Everyone stares at their own communication box. A room can be full of patients, and not one of them aware of what the other is doing. The entire human race is distracted. Always being fed this lie or that. Attention spans are right where you need them to be for the completion of this work. Patients don’t think now, they obey and without even realizing it.  What is there to think about when it’s being done for you? I tell you my boy this can be an exceptional harvest!

Back to Our Father’s work. The modern-day patient, although more educated than patients past, is far less intelligent, less gritty and therefore more suggestible. We were successful in convincing them that morality was indicative of an inferior intellect. This sole accomplishment has brought more pleasure to Our Father than perhaps any other. Because our patients believe themselves to be more enlightened and more advanced than generations past, it will be easy to turn them into repeaters of history. Tell the patients that what they are doing, that what they believe, what they are advocating for couldn’t possibly be the same kind of thing that led to the demise of millions of The Enemy’s chosen so many years ago, because that looked so much different from this. After all, we are not going house to house and filling trains with people. There is no overt bigotry taking place at all. In fact dear nephew, tell the patients that they are the ones being mistreated and put in harm’s way by their opposition. Yes that will work. Blind projection is an invaluable tool.

To move the repeaters to action we will use the same triad as before; fear, strength, and of course hope. To review, selfishness is the nature of every patient. That being said, as before, it is easy to make them do Our Father’s work if we can make them fear. Tell them that the opposition’s refusal to cooperate puts their very lives at risk. When they hear the truth tell them it’s nothing more than an attempt to harm them. Make them question science or believe lies disguised as science. You get the idea. Next is strength. This worked so beautifully before. Tell the patients that what they are doing to the opposition is a sign of strength. That not only are their actions moral and just, but that it makes them morally superior to the opposition. Convince them that they are heroes. Last is hope. Now, the last time this was used nephew, this arm of the triad was instituted first because our area of focus were patients downtrodden after a difficult war and the hope of rebirth was what the people needed to motivate them. Not this time. No good nephew, this time the hope comes in the form of a return to normal after the fear and illusion of strength have been established. Suggest to the more prominent patients that one way to encourage the lesser ones is to bait them with the promise that their efforts will be rewarded with a return to the normalcy they remember. This of course is not possible, but when they begin to realize that, distract them with our most fierce weapon in this new age; the press. Make them incapable of independent or compassionate thought by telling them when those thoughts arise, that they should consult with their communication boxes to confirm or deny everything, even the soundness of their pesky principles. This distraction will drown out The Enemy’s attempts to thwart our efforts.

I have every confidence that your efforts will be successful. You are becoming quite skilled in the work of distraction and confusion and Our Father has taken notice. You have delivered to him many new and entertaining playthings, but there are so many more for whom he hungers. I will say, the patients are becoming much easier to convince. If things keep going in this direction, we may soon see the fulfillment of his desires with very little creativity on our part. Imagine spending more time by the lake of fire at Our Father’s feet delighting in our patients’ screams! H-ven indeed! Gotta run. I’m being called to talk to our more enthusiastic friends in the desert. They’re my favorites.

Affectionately yours,
Uncle Screwtype

P.S. Keep telling the opposition that it is better to be peaceful than to make a fuss. It’s working.

A better search engine:
Visit our Discussion Forum at

Follow us: