Secret Message in James Comey’s “Taylor Swift” Video?

James Comey posted this video to his Substack on Sunday evening, after President Trump’s Alaska meeting with President Putin.

I couldn’t bring myself to watch it. There’s a lot of trauma there – for me, for him…

Luckily, I stumbled on the first John Ward video I’ve seen in five years. He’s swooped-in to take one for the team and to unravel these mystery comms, invoking quantum superposition and wavefunction collapse, breaking it all down – thus, forcing me to watch it.

Comey’s video brought back memories of Ye Olden Tymes, when Comey would tweet Dog Comms (thank you, ADL!) years before I was permabanned.

I did Nazi zees Taylor Swift Comms coming! Talk about zee Alice in Wonderland Technique!

Pleeeeeeeeeze!!! Make the cringe stoooooooop!!! I’ll do anything!!!

The former FBI Director, of course, along with former CIA Director John Brennan are being criminally investigated by the DOJ for their roles in the Russia Hoax, including making false statements to Congress (allegedly). Is Comey angling for an insanity plea?

Whatever it is, his slimy manifesto is NOT about Taylor Swift.

My humble hypothesis is that Comey’s Swiftie Comms have permanently collapsed the wavefunction around him. He’s become eternally trapped in Hypercringe Mode throughout every possible parallel universe and in every possible dimension, just as Zod and his treasonous conspirators were banished to the Phantom Zone.

And it couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.

…

TRANSCRIPT

(Roll video posted by James Comey on Sunday)

James Comey: Hey everybody, welcome back to my Substack. Last week’s cold turns out to have been COVID. Quite a flashback.

And Donald Trump is still President and still humiliating America on a national stage, standing next to Vladimir Putin.

It’s like a dream, a bad dream you can’t wake up from.

But I don’t want to talk about that bad dream this week. I want to talk about a truly inspirational public figure named Taylor Swift.

John Ward: I’m sorry, what? This is truly inspirational public figure, former FBI director, and Swiftie-gay, James D. Comey.

The D is for drapist, because he f***s window hangings. But that was a long time ago, so we’re just going to skip that part. I’m going to talk about and fast forward to 2025, where he’s turned into an extremely unfun version of Schrödinger’s Cat, existing off-the-grid and -radar, in some sort of probabilistic state between being both a Justin Belieber and the record mogul who sculpted him into a meth head with a chisel called “Rape”.

About once every three months, James Comey opens the box, the wave function collapses, and you get a temporarily well-defined look at James Comey, most recently in May 2025, when he took to Instagram with his infamous and now-deleted “8647” seashells.

And then he fades back into the great wormhole of irrelevancy like an Ouroboros, if instead of snake, it was made of a**hole.

The details of what he chooses to do with his free time on these quarterly sabbaticals into his own anus, we may never know. But we do actually have a pretty good idea of what he’s up to in general, and that idea explains the ineffable horror of this video, which would otherwise be absolutely f*g crazy.

(Continue rolling video posted by James Comey on Sunday)

James Comey: Of course, I watched her podcast interview with the Kelsey Brothers. Of course, I watched the whole thing, although on YouTube, Patrice and I got kicked off for the last 15 minutes and finished it on her phone. But I watched it.

You see, Taylor Swift and I go way back. I went to my first concert of hers 15 years ago. I’ve been to a second and I have helped financially support the attendance of a lot of family members at others. I’m in a family Swiftie Group Chat.

John Ward: If you’re stopping the video because you’re realizing James Comey isn’t talking about Taylor Swift, congratulations. You get it.

(Rewinds and replays section of James Comey video a few times)

James Comey: You see, Taylor Swift and I go way back. I went to my first concert of hers 15 years ago.

John Ward: 15 years ago coincides with Hillary Clinton becoming Secretary of State under Barack Obama, who would appoint Comey to FBI Director in 2013, just in time to oversee Hillary Clinton’s email server fiasco, and Comey would hold that position through the 2016 election between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, exerting his influence until Trump’s surprising victory, which led to his draping addiction and subsequent removal.

Understand that since then – especially, when Trump has been in power – Comey and his co-conspirator friends, “family”, if you will, have been under constant surveillance, and they know it.

They also have all worked in espionage for longer than most of us have been alive and appear to have orchestrated one of the most complex and long-lasting illegal intelligence operations in human history against a sitting president – who knew they were his enemies.

It should then come as no surprise that such a “family” would have the wherewithal and know-how to communicate with one another using, say, coded language and, say, social media dead drops of critical information.

This could be through the use of steganography, hiding information and image data and then posting random images, or by posting short videos with obvious double-speak, hidden symbolism, or hidden messages.

(Resumes playing James Comey video)

James Comey: I know all her music and I listen to it on my headphones when I cut the grass.

So yes, I have a favorite of hers, although honestly, for me, it’s a tie between “All Too Well” – 10-minute version – and “Exile” featuring Bon Iver.

Taylor Swift has grown up with my family and provided us a soundtrack, really, as we’ve grown, ourselves and learned and adapted and dealt with adversity and celebration.

She had songs for all of it. I suspect that’s something that millions of Americans have also experienced in their families.

John Ward: And if you can’t talk to your congregation directly, seemingly random videos might also be a good place for a little religion.

(Resumes James Comey video)

James Comey: I think that’s because Taylor Swift produces great art, but also because she models something. At every stage of her career, she’s shown a certain way of being that resonated with my kids and also felt right to me, as a parent. And she’s still doing that as a grown-up.

Like a lot of you, I struggle with how to stand up to bullies, without letting their meanness infect me and change me. You may have seen that the governor of California has been generating a lot of attention lately by posting on social media in a satirical way, where he mocks Donald Trump and his all-caps megalomania and his absurdity. And I find it very funny – hilarious, even, sometimes.

But I gotta be honest, it also leaves me with a strange feeling at times, because I don’t want us to become like Trump and his followers.

There are far more decent, honest, kind people in America than there are mean jerks. And don’t get me wrong, we have our jerks, millions of them, you may have noticed!

In particular, there’s a stunning coarseness and ugliness in the Republican Party today.

John Ward: And last but not least: marching orders.

(Resumes James Comey video)

James Comey: And to be clear, I am not an advocate for weakness.

Of course, we need to stand up to jerks and defend what matters. But I think we have to try to do that without becoming like them. Which is what makes me think about Taylor Swift.

She’s made clear that she sees Donald Trump for what he is. And last year she urged Americans not to make the serious mistake of electing him.

Of course, we’re now living with the consequences of that mistake but while our elderly, makeup-covered president is posting about whether Taylor Swift is still “hot” and declaring that he “can’t stand her”, what’s she doing? Living her best life, producing great music and, as she urged all of us to do during the podcast, not giving the jerks power over her mind.

She said something about dealing with internet trolls that stuck with me: “Think of your energy as if it’s expensive, she said. As if it’s like a luxury item. Not everyone can afford it.”

I really enjoy reading Arthur Brooks who writes columns about happiness in The Atlantic. I don’t know if he’s a Swiftie, but last week he wrote about research on the way that being rude or snarky actually hurts the rude person, as he wrote, when you become less polite, the alteration in your conduct can make you less happy, more depressed, and angrier about life.”

I know you get that, even without the research. Just watch Fox News or hang around an ex- and you’ll see what he means.

We can’t stop people from being jerks. What we can do is stop it from hurting us, from changing us.

At my second Taylor Swift concert in Hartford, Connecticut, 14 years ago this summer, she sang a song about this topic, asking, “Why you got to be so mean?” And she spoke directly to the nasty people: “I bet you got pushed around. Somebody made you cold, but the cycle ends right now, because you can’t lead me down that road.”

You’ll be glad I didn’t sing that. That’s right, because down that road is unhappiness. Nobody should have that power over us. Thank you, Taylor Swift. Keep the faith.

John Ward: That’s it for today. I’m John Ward, and until next time, remember, you’re a world champion. Don’t let your memes be dreams.

Contributed by Alexandra Bruce

Contact