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Today is August 4, in the two-thousand-and-twenty-fifth year of our Lord, and not a single person from the Obama-Biden regime has been arrested. However, the WNBA was able to track down and arrest the person who threw a neon green dildo on the court. So, like, at least the authorities are working for some people.
To recap how we got here, in the middle of a WNBA game between two teams who aren’t the Indiana Fever (and therefore you haven’t heard of them), the game had to be stopped for what, surprisingly enough, was only the second dumbest reason of the summer. An object was thrown on the court. A bright green object that was long and bulbous, and looked like a giant… OH MY GOD!
This isn’t the first time a foreign object has been thrown on the field of play during a sporting event. It was a regular occurrence during the late 90s era of the New World Order (4 life). However, and I know this might surprise some people, but the journalimers who cover the WNBA and a few of the people who work there were not as amused as everyone else in America. They got the last laugh, though.
The perpetrator has been identified and arrested for his hilarious actions.
The WNBA said Saturday that the individual who threw a sex toy onto the court at an Atlanta Dream game earlier in the week was arrested and that any person throwing objects onto the court will be ejected from the arena and face a minimum one-year ban.
The person hasn’t been publicly identified. Yet. I’m sure the tens of WNBA fans are in the process of doxxing the perpetrator so he/him, she/her, and/or they/them can become a new icon in our everlast culture wars.
It is also unclear what crime the person was charged with that led to the arrest. A serious sports league would have shrugged it off and perhaps have asked security to keep a close eye on any future dildo throwers. The WNBA, somewhat shockingly, could not calm down about it or let it go. My guess is that local police were nagged until they arrested anyone.
The question that remains is if this will end the dildo throwing, or encourage MORE dildo throwing during future games.
I think we know the answer.
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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn’t writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.
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Author: Brodigan
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