The problem of Effeminate Men, Priests, and Parishes – Part 1

Too many men lack masculinity, too many Catholic parishes are effeminate, and too many clergy are homosexual. These problems, clandestinely stirring in the background for decades, are now too evident to ignore.

This first part of a series of three articles on the topic will tackle the problem of the growth of effeminate males in the culture. A large number of unmanly husbands and dads creates a number of negative consequences, including the upcoming generations of boys growing up with poor role models.

Then parts two and three will address the lack of masculinity in Catholic parishes and in the priesthood. This has caused men to leave their faith in high numbers, parishes to turn overly feminine, and the Mass to lose its masculine fervor. These problems are associated with numerous priests depicting effeminacy or displaying an affinity toward homosexuality.

Effeminacy in Males Is Not a Virtue

Some definitions are in order before proceeding. Effeminacy is not the same as femininity. Femininity is a virtuous characteristic that applies to women. It parallels a male pursuing the virtue of masculinity. The word effeminate, however, typically defines a man exhibiting mannerisms or behaviors typically associated with women.

Saint Thomas Aquinas in The Summa Theologica defines “effeminacy” as a vice. An effeminate man, according to Aquinas, is soft, readily yields, and is reluctant to suffer due to an attachment to comfort. Aquinas notes that an effeminate man will not stand up or push back against wrong. This failure to act is due to lacking the courage, finding things too difficult, and/or not wanting to give up pleasurable comfortableness.

An effeminate man or an effeminate Catholic parish then, is one that is too soft to push back against the secular culture. In short, an effeminate man or parish is one that is too weak to follow Jesus’s Truths.

As the spiritual head of his family, the husband/father is called to boldly and resolutely take the lead in his wife’s and children’s practice of the faith. Effeminate men are the weak and laissez-faire ones when it comes to practicing the tenets of their Faith, even though this is arguably exactly what Catholic husbands and fathers are called to do.

In addition, effeminacy is on display these days (as described here and here) by the failure of fathers to fight as hard as mothers against so-called trans boys competing in female sports against their daughters. It is on display by the millions of young men who find commonality with other males by lazily sitting on couches all day playing video games.

Conversely, a masculine man has the fortitude to swim upstream and fight against the current, even though it will be less enjoyable and more arduous. Patrick Henry, the famous American statesman and Revolutionary War commander, once said:

“Adversity toughens manhood, and the characteristic of the good or the great man is not that he has been exempt from the evils of life, but that he has surmounted them.”

Young Boys Being Raised Improperly

Never before in our history has the culture been content with raising boys to enter adulthood somewhat resembling women in their mannerisms, appearance, and temperament. Except for these past few decades, husbands and dads have always been strong authority figure in their families.

Masculinity declined when society embraced the godless ideology of radical feminism. The world promoted women to be men’s equals in everything. The modern belief became there is no difference between the sexes. At the same time, too-spirited, little boys were overly medicated to make them more docile.

The world’s distorted view of masculinity falsely advertises it as being a toxic vice. The media, Hollywood, and the educational system warn young men about the evilness of growing up masculine. To be masculine supposedly means to be dangerously aggressive and nastily sexist. The culture praises effeminacy. It falsely teaches men to become emasculated, delicate pushovers who will tolerate everything while moving aside to let the women lead.

The truth is a real man acts as both a servant and a leader. If a man is a servant while neglecting to be a leader, he simply comes across as a doormat. If a man is a leader while neglecting to be a servant, he comes across as a tyrant. Thus, a masculine male must balance the times he needs to serve his family and the times he needs to lead his family. A masculine priest will do likewise. His vocation is to both serve and lead his flock.

Males Are Purposely Made to Be Different than Females

Our Creator wanted men to develop and remain a particular way. He forged men’s muscles to grow faster and stronger than a typical female’s body makeup. The Almighty created males both biologically and intuitively differently. This is why throughout history men have progressed into being fighters, hunters, and protectors

Females are naturally “softer” than males in both physicality and temperament. This is good for women as it is what God designed. Nonetheless, recent generations have lost their appreciation for these purposeful and beneficial differences. The world needs men to remember their manliness and cooperate with God’s design.

Men should not desire to develop into effeminate beings. They also should not feel shame for acting vigorously, resolutely, and fearlessly. Males were naturally formed to be more “hard” in both their physicality and make-up, and not so “soft.”

Jesus Was the Epitome of Masculinity

Real masculinity is about fortitude, perseverance, and standing for your beliefs in the face of peril. Real masculinity mean sacrificing. Real masculinity translates to a rejection of this world, because a Christian knows he must live in this world, but not of this world.

Jesus’s words in Matthew 7:13-14 explain how one can choose to take one of two paths in life. One is wide and easy, so most take this. But it leads to destruction. The other path is narrow and hard, so few take this. An effeminate man’s principles are malleable and his actions are easily manipulated. Thus, he sticks to the easier route that most of the world is taking.

Jesus Christ was clearly the ultimate example of manliness. Modern society has falsely transformed Jesus into a hippie-like, peace-loving figure who only wants to hug everyone and tolerate everything. The actual Jesus manifested masculinity when He:

• suffered for 40 days in the desert;
• fashioned a whip, lashed at vendors in the temple, and overturned their tables;
• called out the scribes and Pharisees as “hypocrites,” “blind fools,” “serpents,” and “brood of vipers;”
• said tough things even if it upset people so much that they chose to leave Him, such as “eat the flesh of the Son of man and drink his blood” or “sell what you possess and give to the poor;”
• commanded people to sin no more;
• stood up for a woman being stoned to death;
• and ultimately suffered the worst imaginable pain possible when He sacrificed His life for us.

The Church Has Failed to Help Develop Masculinity in Men

Regrettably, the Church has not been doing a good job in the past half-century or so of engaging men as men and equipping them to be strong husbands, dads, or priests. It used to be easy to spot an abundance of masculine males in the community and in the pews. They were the strong authority figures who exhibited the virtues of bold leadership, mettle, and perseverance.

Nowadays, the culture focuses on males who have embraced the modern, glamorized qualities of collaboration, tolerance, and androgyny. This has permeated into the Church. Many clergy and parishes downplay, even shame, traditional manly virtues and highlight more effeminate characteristics.

The result? Large numbers of men have become disengaged from their Catholic faith. They do not become the spiritual leaders of their families, even though Ephesians 5:21-33 says God wants men to be just that.

Results from various polling sites in recent years reveal there has been an exodus of Catholic men from Mass attendance and parish participation. Men have increasingly grown casual about Catholicism. The lack of men in the pews sends a signal to the next generation of males – their young sons – that it is not manly to be Catholic.

Also, when not enough males get involved in their parish, this weakens the local church. One obvious effect is fewer candidates are available to consider priesthood.

Challenging them with the hard truths of the faith and calling them to be the courageous heads of their families are what motivates men. If males aren’t challenged by their pastors’ homilies or taught about authentic Catholicism in their religious formation, they will do one of two things. They will either leave the Church and look for it elsewhere or remain in the Church but in a lukewarm manner where they fail to develop their full, masculine selves.

Real Men Step Up, Push Back, and Speak Out

In 2015, then Bishop of Phoenix, Thomas Olmsted, published Into the Breach: An Apostolic Exhortation to Catholic Men. He wrote on the predicament of a decline in active Catholics. Most notably, more older Catholic men are passing away or leaving Catholicism than younger men are staying in or joining the Catholic Faith.

To fix this distressing state of affairs, the Bishop challenged all the men of his diocese with this call:

“So I call upon you to open your minds and hearts to Him, the Savior who strengthens you to step into the breach! I offer this Exhortation as an encouragement, a challenge, and a calling forth to mission for every willing man: priests and deacons, husbands, fathers and sons, grandfathers and widowers, young men in preparation for your vocation… Men, we must never believe that holiness and courage are things of the past!… Indeed, in this time of evil’s growing boldness, each man must prepare himself for nothing less than martyrdom, whatever form this may take, and to instill in his children and grandchildren the willingness to do the same.”

Bishop Olmsted noted how the Church is losing the battle with Satan because too many Catholics have quit being active. This battle can be won, but only if men follow St. Paul’s words to “put on the armor of God so that you may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the devil.” (Ephesians 6:11-17)

Olmsted then named specific, daily, weekly, and monthly practices men can adopt so to take up their cross and engage in spiritual combat. Like soldiers would prepare for battle and follow the commands of their mortal king, Catholic men need to prepare and strengthen themselves as they follow Jesus, their Sovereign King. These practices and devotions include daily prayer, weekly Mass, and monthly confession. But fathers must not be content just with doing this themselves. Real man need to teach and expect their children to embrace similar spiritual practices.

Finally, Bishop Olmsted sent a message exclusively for clergy:

“I call upon my brother priests to awaken the sense of transcendence in the hearts of men through reverent and beautiful liturgy, helping men to rediscover Jesus in the Eucharist each and every Sunday. I ask my brother priests to teach the faithful about the powerful truth of the liturgy, especially in ways to which men can relate. Teaching men to understand the fullness and power of the Mass must be a top priority. What a joy it is for men of God when they are led by priests who have a confident sense of their own masculinity.”

When he becomes a dad, a father takes on the vocation of being the head of his family and leading them to God. When he becomes a pastor, a man of the cloth takes on a similar, priestly vocation. In order to be heads and leaders, lay males and ordained males male must  demonstrate grit, vigor, and fortitude. They must be willing to step up, push back, and speak out about all the cultural depravities poisoning their “children.”

To Be Continued

Society goes by way of the family. The family goes by way of the husband/dad. If we want to change the world for the better, husbands and dads must be real men. If we want to revitalize the Church and bring more people to Catholicism, clerics must be truly masculine.

In one of his most recent podcasts, titled “Want Priests? Stop Hating Men!“, Father Robert McTeague noted:

“If we’re going to have men be priests, we should let men know that we like them, that we appreciate their masculinity, that we appreciate their distinctive masculine characteristics and charism. And I don’t just mean having a beard. If we look at the icons of the male soul, we know that men are meant to take a hike, they’re meant to be pilgrims like Abraham, they’re meant to take a stand, they’re meant to be warriors like David, and they’re meant to take charge in the image of Christ the King.”

Part two of this three-part article will delve into how un-masculine priests have created overly feminine parishes. Part three will address the elephant in the room.