Migrants will not stop molesting and assaulting children at swimming pools in the best and most democratic Germany of all time

In the last ten years, we’ve welcomed a lot of ill-behaved and criminal young men into our country for no discernible reason, and along the way we’ve had the dubious privilege of discovering whole new categories of crime. There is the hostile-immigrant-drives-his-car-into-a-crowd-of-unsuspecting-innocents crime, there is the hostile-immigrant-stabs-a-bunch-of-random-people crime, there is the immigrant-gang-collectively-rape-underage-girl-in-park crime, and there is the immigrants-at-swimming-pool-molest-or-assault-various-children crime.

The latter has been stealing the headlines since the latest (allegedly carbon dioxide-induced) “heatwave” in Germany. Recent stories include this one about a 25 year-old man of undisclosed background (who is almost certainly a migrant, otherwise authorities would not be so secretive about his origins) exposing himself to a bunch of underage teenagers at a pool in Asperg (Baden-Württemberg). Or this one, about a 21 year-old Syrian at a pool in Schweinfurt (Bavaria) caught exposing himself to four boys. Or this one, about men of “dark complexion” who severely beat an 18 year-old and threw him down some stairs. Or this disturbing one, about two Syrians who groped and assaulted a 12 year-old girl at a pool in Hof (Bavaria), forcing her beneath the water repeatedly and leaving her with a bloody nose.

Stories like this often come in groups, and what set off the present cascade was a particularly grim incident from 22 June in Gelnhausen (Hessen), in which a group of Syrian migrants aged 18 to 28 molested eight or nine underage girls at the local pool. When the girls first complained about what was happening, pool personnel sent them back into the water. After this incident became a nationwide story, the mayor of Gelnhausen, Christian Litzinger (CDU) gave an interview in which he appeared to ascribe the crime to “high temperatures,” which can cause “tempers to flare up.”

Naturally, this is but a partial list comprising only those news reports that I found, that anybody bothered to report to the police and that have made it into the press. The problem is vastly more pervasive than my brief summary might suggest. Personally, I haven’t been to a public pool in Germany in 10 years. I would never go again, and I would certainly never send my kids there. What used to be occasionally amusing places to get a bit of exercise have become crowded loci of urban chaos invariably full of drunken 20 year-old men from the global south. Everybody knows this is happening but it’s very politically incorrect to acknowledge that it’s happening, and so it’s become the occasion for a great deal of bizarre messaging from our progressive establishment.

A small group of peculiar lunatics have decided that what we really need to do, is remind everybody that groping and assaulting and molesting is not okay. Thus we’ve been treated to an array of bizarre anti-swimming-pool-molestation messaging campaigns that just love to reverse the typical ethnicities of perpetrator and victim.

Consider the Cologne “Ich sag’s” (“I say it”) poster series. “Shoving is not funny!” screams this placard, with an awkward cartoon of a blonde German boy joining in harassing a brown girl:

Another poster from the same series informs viewers that “groping” is “forbidden” and likewise features a blonde German offender, because obviously that’s the problem demographic here.

All of that is irritating enough, but it’s nothing compared to the posters devised by a literal blue-haired city bureaucrat in Büren (near Paderborn), which take the woke programme so far around the bend that I had trouble believing they weren’t intended as subversive parodies. In the anti-groping category, Büren provides this insane PSA of a fat red-haired woman molesting a diminutive black man with a prosthetic leg, while a bizarre sea turtle named Tiki lurks beneath them and deplores unwanted touching.

Tiki the retard turtle who apparently cannot even swim because he requires goggles and flotation devices recurs in this anti-peeping placard, which – you guessed it – features a German man intruding upon a black woman.

Aside from other obvious objections, what strikes me about these posters is how infantilising and trivialising they all are – waving away an entire category of crime that is overwhelmingly, disproportionately committed by adult male migrants as some kind of cartoonish childhood problem that just requires a bit of schoolmarmish clarification to iron out.