Michelle Obama reveals past parenting clash with Barack over infant sleep training

Ever wondered how the Obamas tackled the sleepless nights of parenthood? In a recent podcast episode, Michelle Obama opened up about a surprising rift with her husband, former President Barack Obama, over a controversial sleep-training technique for their daughters, Malia and Sasha, when they were just infants, as the Daily Mail reports.

This revelation came during the latest episode of Michelle’s IMO podcast, where she discussed with her brother Craig Robinson a parenting disagreement that unfolded over three decades of marriage.

Back when Malia, now 26, and Sasha, now 24, were about four or five months old, Barack pushed for the Ferber Method — a sleep-training approach from 1985 by Dr. Richard Ferber that encourages babies to self-soothe by letting them cry at timed intervals, per the Cleveland Clinic. Michelle, however, wasn’t sold on the idea at first. It’s hard to blame her; who wants to hear their little ones wail while progressive parenting trends often frown on such tough love?

Navigating the Ferber Method

Michelle admitted, “Well, I didn’t want to do it.” That hesitation speaks volumes about the maternal instinct clashing with a method that feels, to many, like abandoning a child to their tears. But in a culture where every parenting choice is scrutinized, sometimes practicality has to win out over feelings.

She added, “Barack did it… I went to bed.” Here’s a man stepping up to the night shift while Michelle gets some much-needed rest — credit where it’s due, even if the method itself raises eyebrows among the softer, modern parenting crowd. Turns out, letting Barack handle the crying paid off quicker than a government shutdown.

The Ferber Method worked for the Obamas in under a week, with Malia and Sasha adjusting to self-soothing like champs. It’s a reminder that sometimes the old-school, no-nonsense approaches — despite the hand-wringing of today’s overly sensitive parenting gurus—actually get results.

A shared struggle

Even a guest on the podcast, social psychologist Jonathan Haidt, chimed in with a similar experience using the Ferber Method for his own kids. It’s almost refreshing to hear that not every family bows to the current trend of coddling at all costs. Maybe there’s hope yet for common-sense parenting.

Michelle also confessed, “I would have to cover my ears.” That raw honesty cuts through the polished image of perfect parenthood, often pushed by elite circles. It’s a stark contrast to the woke narrative that every discomfort must be avoided, showing even the Obamas had to grit their teeth and push through.

Fast forward to the teenage years, and the Obamas faced a different kind of challenge with Malia and Sasha. Michelle shared on the Sibling Revelry podcast, hosted by Kate and Olivia Hudson, that their daughters went through a “push away” phase to carve out their own identities. It’s a classic rite of passage, especially for kids of high-profile parents, and hardly a shock in a world obsessed with individuality over family legacy.

Teen rebellion, identity struggles

Now, young adults, Malia and Sasha, have indeed sought to stand apart, with Malia even dropping her last name for a short film premiere at Sundance in 2024, as reported by OK! Magazine. Michelle noted, “We were like, ‘They’re still going to know it’s you.’” A polite jab, but a fair one—reinventing yourself doesn’t erase the family name, no matter how hard you try.

Still, Michelle respected the effort, saying, “We respected the fact that she’s trying to make her way.” That’s a gracious nod to independence, even if one might argue that leaning on fame while rejecting the name feels a tad contradictory. In today’s culture of self-expression over tradition, though, it’s par for the course.

Michelle further explained, “They’re still doing that… with parents who are known.” It’s a universal struggle for children of the famous, but one wonders if the constant push for “authenticity” overshadows the value of honoring one’s roots. Still, the Obamas seem to navigate this with more grace than many in the spotlight.

Lessons from famous family

Reflecting on over 30 years of marriage, with Malia born in 1998 and Sasha in 2001, the Obamas’ journey shows that even the most public of families wrestle with private battles. From sleep training to teenage rebellion, their story isn’t so different from the average American household, minus the Secret Service detail, of course.

What stands out is their willingness to admit disagreement and adapt, whether it’s Barack taking the night shift or respecting their daughters’ need for space. In an era where progressive ideals often demand unwavering consensus, this glimpse of compromise feels almost rebellious in its own right.

So, while the Ferber Method might not win applause from today’s parenting influencers, it worked for the Obamas—and quickly. Perhaps there’s a lesson here: not every traditional approach is outdated, and not every cry needs a cuddle. Sometimes, tough love builds resilience, a concept worth remembering as we wade through the ever-shifting tides of cultural norms.