MIDDLE EAST — The region rejoiced and the world marvelled as peace broke out in the Middle East and lasted a record 27 minutes.
The normal pace of life in the violent, war-torn region was oddly broken up on Tuesday after a ceasefire occurred between Israel and Iran. The ceasefire went into effect shortly after the United States bombed Iran’s heavily guarded nuclear site, but experts are quick to point out that the ceasefire had nothing to do with that.
“I didn’t know what to do at first,” said Yaakov Peretz in Israel. “Normally at this time I am in our neighborhood bomb shelter like every other day. What do people do when bombs and rockets aren’t raining down on them constantly? Maybe I shall go look at a tree or frolic in a meadow. Is that what people do during peacetime? I’m not sure.”
“What? No jihad? That’s terrible,” said Mohammed Abir Mohammed al Mohammed Mohammad of Hamas. “What am I supposed to do? Well, I guess I will go back to beating my wife.”
The world’s leaders condemned the United States for helping to broker the 27-minute ceasefire by stating that ceasefires are too disruptive to the everyday lives of people in the region.
At publishing time, the region had returned to normal as explosions and hatred resumed.
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