“Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.”
—Fernando Sabino
I’ve fallen behind.
I’ve been unable to keep up with communications, except those taking place in person, for more than a week. Texts, emails, comments, both private and pertaining to posts here. Also, good things are happening.
My first “down time” will be Sunday day time.
I have always, my whole life, wanted nothing more than more time, and always needed more time. It can take me 5 days to answer a text. Part of me feels like: “Texts and emails are not real communications.” But that’s because I struggle so to keep up and would like to blame the medium.
My mind does not stay in the present moment very well. I work on it.
I will, after today, set about trying to catch up, respond, and hopefully not have totally permanently alienated any body.
I don’t like “complaining” about time. “I don’t have enough time,” etc. We are all bombarded;
I also don’t really like it when people talk about being “busy.”
But it’s been back to back to back days of no down time for 2 weeks now and I am experiencing a faint panic over the complexity of time, space, tasks, communications, and personal integrity.
What I want is to be allowed to escape Digital World, and find everybody in analog world. In analog world, all communications happen in the same and agreed upon moment.
That’s how we’re made.
NEXT TTB ZOOM
I am not ever letting our Zoom get knocked off course. Only that this weekend, it may have to take place on Sunday.
Our weekly event still needs a name. I considered “Dacha” but when I ran it past my stepmother, in her nursing home last week, she said: “Dachau?”
My sister and I could not help but laugh.
Since we’re not Russian, I think “Dacha” doesn’t actually work, but it conveys the feeling of restoration and renewal through being together we have achieved.
I miss everybody.
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Author: Celia Farber
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