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America has seen the future of illegal alien control, and that future is Alligator Alcatraz.
Nestled deep inside some of the harshest territory in the Florida Everglades, the 3,000 bed detention center couldn’t be a more perfect place to house some of the vilest of the foreign scum to have been allowed to slither across the border during the Biden administration.
Inescapable primarily because even the baddest of hombres would have to be el loco to attempt to venture outside the security fences and then navigate swamps filled with gators, crocodiles, pythons, venomous snakes, and other wildlife, the facility has grabbed headlines even before its official opening.
Alligator Alcatraz: the one-stop shop to carry out President Trump’s mass deportation agenda. pic.twitter.com/96um2IXE7U
— Attorney General James Uthmeier (@AGJamesUthmeier) June 19, 2025
The brainchild of Florida Attorney General James Uthmeier, the facility has repurposed a low-traffic airport with an 11,000-foot runway into a prime destination for criminal illegals as they await their one-way flight out of the United States.
President Donald J. Trump paid a visit to Alligator Alcatraz on Tuesday and came away impressed.
ALLIGATOR ALCATRAZ
“Very soon, this facility will house some of the most menacing migrants—some of the most vicious people on the planet.” – PRESIDENT DONALD J. TRUMP pic.twitter.com/sn5igFZGHU
— The White House (@WhiteHouse) July 1, 2025
“It’s known as ‘Alligator Alcatraz,’ which is very appropriate because I looked outside, and that’s not a place I want to go hiking anytime soon,” the president said. “But very soon this facility will have some of the most menacing migrants, some of the most vicious people on the planet.”
“We’re surrounded by miles of treacherous swampland, and the only way out is really deportation,” Trump added. “And a lot of these people are self-deporting back to their country where they came from.”
And of course it’s already gnawing on the asses of illegal alien-loving Democrats who are demanding that it be shut down.
House Democrats demand closure of “Alligator Alcatraz” https://t.co/OEmebpgAKn
— The Hill (@thehill) July 2, 2025
In a Wednesday letter to Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem that was signed by two dozen House Democrats, the left-wing lawmakers decried Alligator Alcatraz as a detention facility that “intentionally exploits the hazardous natural conditions of the Everglades, threatening migrants with exposure to deadly wildlife and harsh weather conditions.”
“This kind of cruel rhetoric and deliberate endangerment further exemplifies the administration’s shameful, dehumanizing approach to immigration – an approach rooted in anti-immigrant hostility that is morally indefensible and in clear violation of fundamental human rights,” they wrote.
“This remote swamp is notorious for oppressive heat, relentless humidity, severe storms, and perilous terrain infested with venomous snakes, disease-carrying insects, and large predatory wildlife, including alligators and crocodiles,” the Democrats whined.
“The deliberate placement of vulnerable immigrants into such a hostile and lethal environment is morally reprehensible, inherently cruel, and starkly violates basic humanitarian standards,” they said, once again showing far more compassion for justly detained foreign criminals than their victims.
Among the signers were Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY), the mouth that never shuts. Jew-hating terrorist sympathizer Rep. Rashida Tlaib (D-MI), Chinese spy diddler Rep. Eric Swalwell (D-CA), and progressive queen bee Rep. Pramila Jayapal (D-WA), a woman who is so godawfully ugly that her face belongs on a totem pole.
“Erecting tents in the blazing Everglades sun, during hurricane season no less, and call it immigration enforcement is nothing short of disgusting and cruel. Donald Trump and his Administration don’t care if migrant men, women, and children live or die – they only care about cruelty and spectacle,” said one of the lawmakers, Rep. Maxwell Frost (D-FL), a foul-mouthed performative twink from Orlando, in a statement.
Coming soon! pic.twitter.com/v3DCJsrDwV
— Homeland Security (@DHSgov) June 28, 2025
The genius idea of Alligator Alley should be an inspiration to other states looking for a place to hold onto their criminal illegals until they can be deported, and while nothing will quite discourage ideas of escape like having to traverse fifty miles of critter-filled territory with any wrong step having the potential of being a one-way trip into the food chain, there are other natural deterrents.
A facility smack dab in the middle of Georgia’s great Okefenokee Swamp would have similar surroundings of gators and snakes aplenty. In Texas, there are rattlesnakes galore and coyotes to pick clean the bones of any ill-fated illegal who might step on one. Alaska has a large population of bears, as well as being bite-ass cold much of the year, just to name a few.
And there’s always the original Alcatraz in San Francisco Bay with its forbidding currents and shark-filled waters, and after his tour of Alligator Alcatraz, Trump again mused about reopening “The Rock” for business.
“I saw a picture of ALCATRAZ looking so foreboding, and I said, ‘We’re going to look into renovating and rebuilding the famous ALCATRAZ Prison sitting high on the Bay, surrounded by sharks. What a symbol it is, and will be!’” Trump wrote in a Truth Social post.
Unfortunately, Alligator Alcatraz is only for illegals and not Democrats, but one can always dream.
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Author: I.M. Slugga
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