WASHINGTON, D.C. — Doing their part to engage in the day’s traditional hijinx, the United States Congress played a hilarious April Fools joke by announcing they are working hard to serve the American people.
In the ridiculous gag, timed perfectly to coincide lawmakers assured the public they are toiling tirelessly to devise solutions to the pressing problems faced by everyday Americans, totally owning their constituents in the process.
“We promise to do our best,” Nancy Pelosi while holding back a snicker during a Congressional press conference. “The American people have our solemn pledge that everything we do in Washington, D.C. will be done for the benefit of the country and its citizens. We are here for one reason — and one reason only — to work hard on your behalf.”
Other members of Congress standing behind Pelosi struggled to suppress their laughter as he skillfully sold the killer prank.
“We mean it,” Pelosi said, struggling to hold back a smile. “We’re working for you, not to enrich ourselves. It is our duty to protect Americans, secure our borders, and make sure our taxpayers’ hard-earned money never goes to waste. That is our priority. That is our mission. And that is what we will do.”
Chuck Schumer hurriedly scrambled away giggling to preserve the ruse while Speaker of the House Mike Johnson bit his lip to keep himself from breaking character.
At publishing time, Congress was reportedly preparing to issue a grand “April Fools” proclamation before spending the rest of the day planning their upcoming recess activities.
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