Dr. Seuss Bends the Knee (with Joe Biden’s Assist), Cancels Six Titles to Pander to Idiots

Once they came for Mr. Potato Head and the Muppets, I guess it was open season. I’m also shocked to find out I’ve been exposed to such problematic racist propaganda since around 1978 or so. March 2 is “Read Across America Day” to coincide with the birthday of famous children’s author Dr. Seuss. But this is America in 2021. Celebrate anything anywhere and there are people to complain about it. In Dr. Seuss’ case, some of his books written decades ago are said to have “racist and insensitive imagery.”

It was just your usual handful of permaoffended woke tw*ts to be ignored. Unless you’re a local official afraid they’re going to criticize you on Twitter. But then Joe Biden, the president of the United States, validated these idiots by leaving Dr. Seuss out of his “Read Across America Day” proclamation. It’s no surprise that after that, Dr. Seuss Enteprise bent the knee and canceled six titles:

  • “And to Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street”
  • “If I Ran the Zoo”
  • “McElligot’s Pool”
  • “On Beyond Zebra!”
  • “Scrambled Eggs Super!”
  • “The Cat’s Quizzer”

“Dr. Seuss Enterprises listened and took feedback from our audiences including teachers, academics and specialists in the field as part of our review process. We then worked with a panel of experts, including educators, to review our catalog of titles,” it said.

Bullshit. You did not listen to your fans. You did not listen to your stans. You did not work with anyone smart. You did not review a single chart. You’re only doing this as a stunt. You’re only pandering to leftist … jerks? Chuckleheads? Assclowns? This rhyming thing is harder than it looks.

The company chose six titles, four of which I don’t think most people have ever heard of, so leftists will leave them alone. SPOILER: there is no such thing as leftists leaving you alone. It’s also highly suggested not to give in to terrorist demands. The only thing that happens here is they go after “The Cat in the Hat” claiming Thing 1 and Thing 2 are offensive to the non-binary. “Green Eggs and Ham” is problematic because eating meat is bad for climate justice. And the Who that Horton hears is too similar to body-shaming. Then the books go on the fire with the Harry Potter series.

They’re children’s books that make millions of people happy. So of course, leftists in this country want to ruin it. The sad thing is the people who let themselves get bullied into going along.

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