I’ve (sadly) only been to one art museum in my entire life. While on a business trip to England,  I had the chance to visit the London Museum Of Art.  I was mesmerized for 9 hours!  I was particular enthralled by “Blue Boy” and “The Martyrdom of Stephen“; the skill, the detail, they looked like living beings.  The blood oozing from “Stephen” looked real, I swear it. “Blue Boy” looked like he was ready to shake my hand, I swear it.  Simply saying “stunningly beautiful” does the art injustice. 

But, alas,  I recently discovered that Renaissance art is nothing but white supremacy / racism run amuck.  I am so ashamed. I will dedicate my life to only looking for awesome black art, which has what white art lacks;  “soul”, brother.

One reviewer (whom I refuse to link) refers to his art preference as “I love old dead white guy art so much” (I believe he was being sarcastic) says this carving on the left is much superior to what dead white dudes, like Michael Angelo, ever produced.  Now, I’m just not sure a carving of a black guy with a dick coming out of his head is superior to Mr. Angelo’s “David” … but, I’m trying to be more open minded and diverse in my tastes.

So, imagine my joy when the NJ Shit Ledger dedicated a full page to a black artist (from the Ivory Coast) named Frederick Bruly Bouabre.  He has produced thousands of paintings, and several hundred are currently on display at the Museum Of Modern Art in NYC.  He is a painter, artist, writer, inventor of his personal alphabet, and founder of his own religion.  He’s quite the Renaissance Man and you can read more about him HERE.

The author of the Shit Ledger article, Sebastian Smee*, has nothing but the highest praise for Freddy.  It’s a  “display unlike any I have seen” … and “at once overwhelming and refreshing” … and,  “a spur to laughter, fascination and philosophical reflection” …  and “it is art that rinses the mind like cool, silken water drenching a heat-flushed face” ….. and so on for what seemed forever.

[*Sebastian Smee — I believe he is legally blind in one eye and can’t see out the other.]

Of course, I know you all are just dying to see some that art.  “Show us the damned pictures, Stucky!!“.  OK … I’m going to just post five of them.  You’ll get the idea by then.  (NOTE: The names of the pictures are MINE.  This way you can refer to them more easily, if you so desire.)

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“DARNELL AND DESHAWN DECIDE TO FUCK A COW”

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“JAMAL HUMPS A TREE”

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“THE REASON JAMAL DECIDED TO HUMP A TREE”

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WTF???

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BLOWJOBS IN PARADISE

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The other 1,000+ paintings are pretty much the same.  I am trying so damn hard to like these paintings!  Really.  But, I just can’t seem to grok any of it.  This is damned depressing to me because it seems that I am truly a fucking white supremacist. I don’t whether I should see a therapist to help cure me,  or if I should just accept than I am what I am.

Jesus, nothing but WHITE people!!  This ugly talent-less painting by some old dead white dude really is RACIST, man.

THE END